That’s the thing about reacting. Often it’s when we don’t feel in control of a situation, or we have predicted the outcome before it happens. But I had to find a solution, or I’d explode on someone else, or implode and feel crappy.
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By: RevKev Hometown Heroes We grew up with heroes; from books, to celebrities, to green bulky entities that would save us. But I’m seeing that while they are sometimes good role models, my heroes are closer to home. “So much is asked of parents, and so little is given.” –Virginia Satir My parents were high-school […]
By: Marilyn L. Davis “Be wise enough not to be reckless, but brave enough to take great risks.” ― Frank Warre Who and What to Avoid Counselors, therapists and supportive friends all caution about avoiding people, places, and situations that prompt us to think about using. While these external triggers are powerful, […]
By: Marilyn L. Davis “I always find it amazing that we choose to be anonymous in our recovery when our actions in our use were so public.” ~Marilyn Davis, speech celebrating 20 years at HALT Club, 2008 Public Personalities Vs. Anonymous Addict How many of us were: Picked up by the police for drunk […]
By: Marilyn L. Davis “Accept that the addiction exists not because of yourself, but in spite of yourself. You did not come into life asking to be programmed this way. It’s not personal to you—millions of others with similar experiences have developed the same mechanisms. What is personal to you is how you […]
“I’m bored is a useless thing to say. I mean, you live in a great, big, vast world that you’ve seen none percent of. Even the inside of your own mind is endless; it goes on forever, inwardly, do you understand? The fact that you’re alive is amazing, so you don’t get to say, ‘I’m bored. ” ― Louis C.K.
I should logically be able to state, without reservation, which of those five feelings was hurt. However, the reality is that no one can define which of the five feeling categories was hurt, because feelings by themselves cannot be hurt. It’s our egos that get bruised.
And so it is. I will go through the grief process, but I will take consolation in the hearth fire of others, and know that there will be a new day, a tomorrow. Each of us has a way of reaching out and touching another through our words, a gentle reminder of worth, or encouragement when things are difficult.
“Abuse manipulates and twists a child’s natural sense of trust and love. Her innocent feelings are belittled or mocked, and she learns to ignore her feelings. She can’t afford to feel the full range of feelings in her body while she’s being abused—pain, outrage, hate, vengeance, confusion, arousal. So she short-circuits them and goes numb.”
You realize that you aren’t denying that a problem exists and you’re willing to make changes to correct it. These differences might be an action, changing a negative attitude, or you may change your feelings and thoughts about a situation.
But continuing to just ponder the problem, leads to frustration, tension and guilt. In the case of addiction, not changing can and does lead to harsher outcomes.
By: Marilyn L. Davis Sponsors and Accountability Partners Answer the Call “Start where you are-do anything you can do, and do everything you can do until you find something you must do! That something is probably your spiritual gift.” ― Jim George, A Man After God’s Own Heart: Devoting Your Life to What Really […]
We have all manipulated people. But most of us have a preferred method of manipulation. When you learn to spot yours, then you can decide if your manipulation comes at too great a cost and change the behaviors.
“It was not the feeling of completeness I so needed, but the feeling of not being empty.” ― Jonathan Safran Foer, Everything Is Illuminated
