Some family and friends never extend the same amount of trust because they simply will not put themselves in a vulnerable position again. The pain our addiction caused them is too much to forget so quickly.
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Casualties of Addiction: Our Children
Did I realize that I’d taken up arms against my children when I started using? No, I did not set out to harm them; however, that was the result. And just as the history books record the injustices done, each of my children recollects the harm from her perspective.
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Do I Have to Work on my Recovery, Today?
The success of your recovery depends on maintaining vigilance or awareness. You’ve worked hard to give up drugs and alcohol; that’s the getting into recovery. Unfortunately, some people get complacent or self-satisfied when they have accomplished a part of the whole. It’s rather like someone saying they want to eat some cake for dessert and then stopping with only the eggs and flour in the bowl, but saying, “Look, I’m making a cake. I think I’ll take a break.”
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Are You A Recovery Role Model?
By: Marilyn L. Davis “I believe in recovery, and as a role model, I have the responsibility to let young people know that you can make a mistake and come back from it.” ― Ann Richards A Public Role Models for All of Us ___ ___ Ann Richards became the 45th governor of Texas. She appointed record numbers […]
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Happy: One of the Seven Dwarfs or a State of Mind?
I am not by nature a happy person. I’ve often said in a judgmental way that, “Happy is just one of the Seven Dwarfs.” But after he left our session, I decided to re-frame my perception. Rather than stating that I’m content and satisfied, I inserted happy about the circumstances in my life, happy about what I do for a living, happy with my relationships, and happy about my living environment.
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Is It Time for Your Undeniable Moment of Change?
By: Marilyn L. Davis “I’ve come to believe that in everyone’s life, there’s one undeniable moment of change, a set of circumstances that suddenly alters everything.” Nicholas Sparks ___ ____ Words of Wisdom about Change Are some of you wondering how often I can write about change? Get tired of me prattling on […]
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What Does It Mean to ‘Look at Yourself’ in Recovery?
People in my recovery support meetings said I had to look at myself, when that was the last thing I wanted to do. I disliked what I saw in a mirror, let alone go within to discover that I was like the Picture of Dorian Gray, presenting favorably to the world, but full of self-serving, self-centered, unhealthy characteristics, and a perception of evil inside. It was difficult to face, that much like Dorian, I had sold my soul to my addiction.
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You Can Not Buy Self-Esteem
“If we get our self-esteem from superficial places, from our popularity, appearance, business success, financial situation, health, any of these, we will be disappointed, because no one can guarantee that we’ll have them tomorrow.” ~Kathy Ireland
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We Are All Recovering From Something
Families develop a blind eye about the elephant in the room, and pretend that something so obvious as the neglect, abuse, or dysfunction do not exist. Recovering from these issues is as important as recovering from addiction.
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Recovery: All the Numbed Feelings Pop Back Up
Those feelings and thoughts about our life were held down rather like a jack-in-the-box – hidden away only by the mechanism of the box, or in the case of our addiction, by our use.
Take away the drugs and alcohol, and the feelings come flooding back, seemingly without rhyme or reason. However, emotional memory stores all those old feelings. They are still there.
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Recovery: Leaving the Shore Behind
Last night in the group, this same young man, said, “I’ve been doing bare-bones and haven’t used. I’m finally feeling better, I’ve made a few changes, and I’m being responsible and accountable to my family and my work, and I’m ready to leave the shore, Ms. Marilyn. Where to next?”
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Resentments, Like Old Shoes, Should Be Retired
One of the problems with holding onto resentments is they no longer serve their purpose, much like the worn out shoes.
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Attitude and Gratitude: The Heart of Recovery
By: Marilyn L. Davis Changing our Attitudes “Could we change our attitude, we should not only see life differently, but life itself would come to be different. Life would undergo a change of appearance because we had undergone a change of attitude.” ― Katherine Mansfield For some of us, the positive attitude and […]
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Ambivalence: It is Time-Consuming and Not Getting You Anywhere
Ambivalence or of two minds happens when a person has both positive and negative feelings about someone or something and is struggling with deciding which option has more merit.
You’ll know you are ambivalent if you think conflicting thoughts about something, or hear yourself talking about a subject and then qualify it with a “but….”, “however…..”, or “on the other hand I think or feel……”.
