Note from Marilyn L. Davis: While this is a slight departure from many of the blogs on addiction and recovery, it is an excellent reminder of the power of words. When you share your recovery, know that what you say, how you say something, and when you say it might be the difference in healing and harming.
By: Rev. Dr. Kevin T. Coughlin Ph.D.
“. . . of all the weapons of destruction that man could invent, the most terrible-and the most powerful-was the word. Daggers and spears left traces of blood; arrows could be seen at a distance. Poisons were detected in the end and avoided. But the word managed to destroy without leaving clues.” ― Paulo Coelho
The Power and Problem with Words
Words are very powerful, even life changing or ending! What I thought I heard you say, isn’t what you meant to say, or what you actually did say, because your thoughts and words were not the same as my understanding, and my perception of your words is much different from yours!
How’s that for a mouthful!
The Promise of Words
Listening is the most powerful communication skill that we have as human beings.
Those who master this skill will have a major advantage over other people in business, relationships, and in life. When we listen, we pick up on other subtle nuances in what is said because:
- 55% of communication is body language
- 38% is tones and inflections
- 7% is the spoken word
Mastering the skills of reading body language, tones, and inflections will also give a person a huge advantage in life over other people. These skills are all priceless in the business world, relationships, recovery and in general._
Verbal Abuse Hurts, Too
If you think about the first example of Beth and the message that she heard her parent say. She carried a lie in her spirit for years after that day. The lie was that she was faulty, no good, didn’t measure up, less than, a loser, not intelligent, and that her parents loved her sister more.
Beth needs a new directive; that she is a good person, that she has a purpose and a place, a right to be, and that she is a good person that her family loves.
Creating Your Own Words
Even Individual Letters are Powerful
Even single letters can end you up behind bars! If you ever get pulled over for suspicion of drunk driving, you better know your ABCs!
If you slur or mix up a few letters, chances are, you’re going to spend the night in the drunk tank!
All because of a few letters; or maybe reality is because of a few too many drinks?
This decision is a personal choice based on culture, family, Worldview, and religion.
The World of Words
In today’s world, we have texting, Twitter, Facebook, fax machines, cell phones, all kinds of social media, video games, Xbox, PlayStation, DIRECTV, Cable, Laptops, Kindles, tablets, desktops, Smartphones, GoToMeeting, Vsee, YouTube, LinkedIn, Pinterest, Instagram, and Skype.
However, what is lost is the art of face to face communication.
Utilizing the spoken word, reading body language, tones, and inflections, understanding active listening, is slowly becoming a lost art form.
The more people lose the understanding of human communication; the more chaos in the world will come. Communication brings consistency and teamwork that benefits every human being on the planet.